Sunday, April 27, 2014

Transitions are Hard

Well hello.  My name is Katie, and I used to blog here.

Let me tell you a little something about myself that many of you who know me in real life know well about me.  Change is not usually my friend.  I enjoy predictability.  I thrive on routine.

This little blog of mine has followed this predictability.  Every Wednesday night, I had a BUMPdate picture texted to me, which I then put into a blog post and scheduled it to post on Thursday mornings.  This is how many of you have come to know this blog of mine.  I had a nice little schedule going.  I didn't really have to think about what I was going to post.  There was no planning.

*Enter this sweet angel*

Suddenly, not only do I have my entire life flipped upside down...I also have about 1,387,654 things I could possibly post about.

If I'm being honest, I have sat down to blog every single day this week and I just have no idea what to even say.  I don't know where to start.  I feel like the past year on this blog has been waiting for the birth of this little miracle and the pressure to produce some sort of amazing, tear-jerking, beautiful blog post was just more than I could take.

So I didn't post anything.

I'm going to sit down tomorrow and write her birth story.  Then I'll have some other highlights from our first week together including her first week update...followed quickly by her 2 week update.  Then we should be back in business around here.

Thanks for being patient with me.

Lots of Love -

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Happy Easter

Happy Easter

Love, Kamdyn

Sorry for my silence lately.  I've been adjusting to life with that adorable little bunny above.  I will be back this week with some updates and LOTS of pictures.  Enjoy your Easter with family...I know I will be thanking the Good Lord for all of the blessings in my life!

Happy Easter -

Sunday, April 13, 2014

Dear Katie,

Here's a little insight from your pre-parenthood self just in case you need a little reality check when your days and nights are a constant blur, when your infant is shrieking and you have no idea why, when you are cleaning baby poop out from under your nails - when you have absolutely no idea why on Earth you decided to take on this little adventure.  Read and re-read this until you remember me...your pre-parenthood self.

Tomorrow you will become a mom.  The one job you always dreamed of.  As of tomorrow, every single thing you ever wanted in your life you will have.  You wanted a college degree, a teaching job in your home district that you love, a loving and supportive husband you get to come home to every night, and a baby.  Check, check, check...and as of tomorrow, check.  You worked hard in college, you worked hard to get your job, your marriage has been a work in progress, patience & love...but becoming a mom?  You never knew hard work until you worked for that little girl.  You fought hard for the job of being her mom.  Do not forget that.  Ever.

On this day, the day before you become a mom, you want nothing more than to be holding that baby.  You have dreams about the amazing and remarkable things she is going to do with her life.  You feel as if every second of every day will never be enough to spend with her.  The thought of sharing her with other people makes you cringe because you just want to hog her all the time.  First of all, remember, it takes a village to raise successful kids.  You need help.  Kamdyn needs lots of people who love her in her life.  Even though you might not want to, share your baby with the people who love you and her.  But also use this to remind yourself that you get 18 years with her - after that, it's just bonus time.  When she's an adult, you don't want to wish you'd spent more time with it now.  Stop cleaning, stop working, stop running in circles - snuggle your baby.  Play with your baby.  Watch your baby.  Soak up your baby.

As a teacher and a coach, you see all kinds of kids every single day.  Remember your #1 job.  Your number one job as her mother is to prepare her to be a successful adult who is kind and compassionate.  You want her to be an adult who works hard and is a world-changer.  You don't want her to be unable to make her own decisions, to dress herself, to function without you.  You.Do.NOT.want.that.  Every decision you make serves to get you both closer to that goal.  When you have to remind her for the 100th time to brush her teeth before bed, when you have to show her one more time how to sort her dirty clothes, when you are frustrated beyond belief because she forgot her lunch on the counter - remember your #1 job.  When your heart is breaking because she doesn't make the team, when you want so badly to march into school to fix something for her, when you want to fight her fights - remember your #1 job.  You're not really helping her by doing it for her. Remember the bigger picture.  

Be nice to Kevin.  Not everything is his fault.  Even though you have little patience when you don't get enough sleep - try not to take it out on him.  He's trying his best too.  Let him bathe her, even though he might not do it like you.  Let him put her to sleep even though you really want to, remember how much it melts your heart when he used to put Kaitlyn to sleep.  Try not to lose your mind when he doesn't follow your OCD directions - a little unstructured time will be good for Kamdyn.  Ask him for help, even when you think it might be faster and easier to just do it yourself.  You don't really mean any of that.  You want nothing more than to enjoy this experience with him.  And above all else, remember that after Kamdyn grows up, you will still be married to Kevin.  Keep working on your marriage.  Your priorities are God, Kevin, and then your child.  Keep that in mind.

Do not allow yourself to become someone who forgets me - your pre-parenhood self.  I love to go out to eat with friends, I love reading, I love going to work each day, I love going on dates with Kevin, I love eating dinner with my mom, I love blogging, I love having Sam & Maicey over for sleepovers, I love going to get my nails done, I love going to girls night scrapbooking events, I love coaching, I love "me time".  Even though you're a mom - you still are a wife, a sister, a daughter, a friend, a teacher.  Although being Kamdyn's mommy might become your favorite "I love" on this list - don't forget about all the other parts of that list.  

And lastly, you can do this.  There will be lots of things you don't know.  There will be lots of mistakes you make.  There will be many days that don't quite go as planned.  It's ok.  Children are resilient.  If she's still breathing and in one piece at the end of each day - it's ok.  Most importantly, do not forget that the only person you have to answer to regarding decisions you make for your child is Kevin.  Everyone will have an opinion.  And people will not always agree with yours.  {I know, this isn't making you feel calm right now because you like to please and you're a perfectionist, but keep reading}  As long as you remember your #1 job and you are making decisions that you think push you toward achieving that #1 goal, you are doing your job.  

After all, really the only thing you need in order to be a great parent, you already have.  You've loved this baby since long before you met her.  And you are her mother.  You are her biggest cheerleader, her biggest critic, her sun, her soft place to land, her first are her mom.  And you're perfect for her.  Because you are her mom.


Thursday, April 10, 2014

38 Weeks - our last BUMPdate

Here is the 38 week BUMPdate: 4/9/14
Kamdyn next to her crib!!  :)
and the side-by-side from last week:
I really missed Dan this week.  The lighting in Kamdyn's room is terrible.  The angle of this picture isn't right.  And my phone camera is blurry because it's not bright enough in that room.  Dan - you're amazing.
Kamdyn has really plumped up this week - she weighs almost 7 lbs and is more than 19" long.  She has a firm grasp and her organs are mature and ready for life outside of her kangaroo.

She is the size of a leek this week:

As I'm sitting here blogging this, Julie & Kamdyn are sitting right here.  Kamdyn is wiggling all over the place and I have felt her move more in the last 4 days than I have the past 9 months.  Julie has been staying with us and I have SO enjoyed the ability to have uninterrupted time with her - not to mention being in the same place as my daughter for more than a few hours at a time.  Item #34,849 that most mothers take for granted when they carry their own children.

This is the last BUMPdate I'll be doing.  Next week at this time, I'll be able to blog pictures of my sweet baby girl.  Even as I type that, it's so surreal to me.  This entire process has felt like an eternity and a blink of an eye all at the same time.  I will be taking one more bump picture before she goes into the hospital and I'll be sure to share that next week sometime.

I promise I will blog pictures as soon as I can, but those of you who aren't following me on Instagram or Facebook might want to consider one of those two things because those images will be uploaded before I get a chance to sit down and blog.

Lastly, I'm getting a little teary-eyed as I'm typing this last part because I am so overwhelmed with thankfulness for each and every single one of you.  When we embarked on this journey and I decided to blog my way through it, I never in my wildest dreams imagined that so many people would take interest and fall in love with our story.  I am so honored that so many of you make our little blog a place you curl up on your couches and visit, or check on your phone each morning, or check quick between chores.  There are many of you that I see each and every day, and more of you that I have never met in my life.  Both are equally amazing to me.  Thank you for caring about our little family.  Thank you for praying with and for us.  Thank you for joining us on this crazy, wild, and incredible ride.  You each mean the world to us.

Love -

Thursday, April 3, 2014

37 Weeks

Here is the 37 Week BUMPdate: 4/2/14

A HUGE shout out to Dan for doing such an exceptional job with these belly pics.  This is the last one he will be week I will take one because Julie will be at our house in preparation for delivery!  Dan is the absolute best - he knew about my little battle with OCD and the scrapbook, so he meticulously took each week's picture as close to the same as he could.  It didn't go unnoticed - and her scrapbook is perfectly aligned because of it.  It's the little things, people!
and the side-by-side from last week:

Kamdyn is the size of a swiss chard.  {a what?!}

She is about 6 1/2 lbs and 19 inches long.  She will spend the next two weeks putting the finishing touches on her lungs and brain so she is fully ready for delivery at 39 weeks.  We were fortunate to have one last ultrasound this week and that baby is so smushed in there, it is insane!  The ultrasound tech said she has a little bit of hair and is absolutely perfect!  These first two pictures make her nose look weird and her cheeks look extremely chubby because she kept putting her arm up and scrunching herself up...I am so anxious to compare the real thing in just a couple of weeks!!

This is her forehead, eyes (kind of looking down) and her nose
This is her face pretty scrunched up - I kinda think she's practicing her duck face.  :)
And this eased my fears from the above pictures where her nose was really terrifying...this picture is her perfect little nose with her eyes closed.  I have no idea what the other stuff is under her nose and frankly I'm not sure I want to know.  Ick.
Can you all believe we have ONE more BUMPdate until delivery day?!  As I blogged about earlier this week, a little tiny part of me is feeling a bit sad.  I am SUPER excited, over-the-moon, cannot-wait-to-hold-my-baby.  But I might never get to experience pregnancy again and this might end up being my only baby - so a small part of me just wants to soak up every moment of the next 2 weeks.  And the remaining 97% is just fine with pressing fast forward!  :)

Happy BUMPday, Friends!  :)